This post was co-authored by Sierrah Hamilton.
Parents today face unique challenges in engaging their children. Studies show that young people spend excessive amounts of time daily interacting with screens, with recent research highlighting the detrimental effects of excessive screen time on youth, including increased anxiety and weakened social skills.
Many caregivers feel lost and ill-prepared, but parents are not passive observers in their child’s mental health journey. Research demonstrates that strengthening parent-child bonds significantly improves a child’s mental, physical, and cognitive health. This type of involvement includes practices like actively listening, validating emotions, and practicing empathy, which together create a safe and supportive environment for children to express themselves freely. Equally important is the ability to establish clear, consistent boundaries while offering unwavering love and support. This balanced parenting approach has been shown to be effective.
Recognizing the signs of mental health concerns in children is crucial for early intervention. These signs may manifest as changes in sleeping habits, declining academic performance, or increased emotional dysregulation. Unmet emotional needs can lead to behavioral problems and difficulties in managing emotions. By understanding these signs, parents can proactively address potential issues, set appropriate boundaries, and seek professional help when needed.
Emotion-focused therapy for youth (EFT-Y), developed by psychologist Mirisse Foroughe, offers a unique approach by strengthening the parent-child bond through collaborative emotional understanding. EFT-Y guides families in developing healthy coping mechanisms and strengthening their parent-child bond, ultimately fostering emotional intelligence and resilience.
A 2024 study found that eight sessions of EFT-Y significantly reduced emotional dysregulation and depression in youth compared to the control group, who did not receive the therapy, indicating its potential effectiveness in addressing these issues.
Krzysztof Błażejewski, a Poland-based EFT-Y clinician, emphasizes the importance of addressing the parents’ own emotional needs, sharing a Polish proverb, “Even Solomon cannot pour from an empty vessel.” He states, “If a parent hasn’t experienced emotional support themselves, they struggle to provide it to their child. That is why the first goal is to ‘pour’ these qualities into the parent so they can experience them firsthand and then embody them.”
What sets EFT-Y apart is its focus on the emotional dynamic within the family. Unlike approaches focused on behavior modification, which aim to change a child’s actions through rewards and consequences, EFT-Y prioritizes understanding and transforming emotional dynamics that underlie behaviors. Parents learn to recognize and respond to their child’s emotional needs, transforming patterns of communication that contribute to distress and dysregulation.
However, EFT-Y is not a one-size-fits-all solution. Lina (name changed for anonymity), who participated as a teenager, noted that resistance or a lack of motivation to change from either party can create barriers to its potential benefits. Also, parents must address their own needs to effectively support their child. In situations involving acute trauma or significant parental mental health challenges, individual therapy may be a necessary first step.
Błażejewski emphasizes that even within a therapeutic setting, the parent’s ability to engage is paramount: “The task is to create a relational space that allows the parent to open up to themselves and experience their emotions, including the painful ones.”
Moreover, parents can actively foster good mental health in their children by establishing daily routines that prioritize emotional connection, such as shared meals or dedicated one-on-one time. Modeling healthy emotional expression and coping strategies, and creating a home environment where open communication is encouraged, also play a pivotal role.
Research has yet to explore the effectiveness of EFT-Y across diverse populations, including families of different cultures and neurodiverse families. Additionally, investigations into the long-term benefits of EFT-Y are needed to provide valuable insights into its lasting impact on family dynamics and child development.
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Sierrah Hamilton is a contributing writer for the Trauma and Mental Health Report and a York University psychology student.
