As the investigation into the disappearance of little Gus Lamont continues, a worldwide peer support group for families grieving the loss of a child has revealed the “overwhelming pain and devastation” that the family “must be experiencing”.
South Australian police have confirmed that there is no immediate intention to initiate a fourth search of the Oak Hill sheep station property outside Yunta, where the four-year-old disappeared on September 27, as the major crime squad continues to search for a lead.
On that fateful Saturday evening in the South Australian outback, Josie Murray called for help as her grandson was nowhere to be found after she last saw him playing on a sandhill close the the homestead.
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The house is located on a massive 150,000-acre station and an army of police, ADF and SES personnel have scoured the area on multiple occasions in the hope of finding the child, initially as a search and rescue and now as a recovery operation.
“Gus is a little four-year-old blond, curly-haired, smiling face young fellow who has been missing from a farm property about 43km south of the township of Yunta,” SA Police assistant commissioner Ian Parrott explained.
“The last time Gus was seen by family is approximately 5pm that night, and when a family member came out later in the evening, they were calling him back inside, they couldn’t find him.
“He’s been described as an adventurous child, shy, but he is also a pretty good walker. But he’s never left the family property with any distance previously that we’re aware of.”
Gus’s father, Joshua Lamont, had spent years renovating a small cottage on a 10-acre property he had purchased an hour’s drive from the sprawling station where his son disappeared, in the hope the family would reunite under one roof.
As final works on the property at Belalia North were due to be completed, tragedy struck, and one of the nation’s biggest ever missing persons search began.
As the story of August Lamont has made headlines around the world, his family pleaded for privacy in a heartfelt statement just over a week after his disappearance and after advice from police.
“This has come as a shock to our family and friends, and we are struggling to comprehend what has happened. Gus’s absence is felt in all of us, and we miss him more than words can express,” the statement said.
“Our hearts are aching, and we are holding onto hope that he will be found and returned to us safely.
“At this time, we kindly ask for privacy as we focus all our energy on supporting the search and working closely with the police.”
The Compassionate Friends (TCF) is a worldwide peer support organisation offering understanding, friendship and hope to families grieving the death of a child, sibling or grandchild — at any age and from any cause.
TCF South Australia is a non-profit organisation run by volunteers and a committee of bereaved parents, siblings or grandparents who rely on grants, donations and fundraising to offer free support to grieving families via their helpline, community events and monthly grief support meetings.
“We can certainly understand the overwhelming pain and devastation that Gus’s family must be experiencing,” said a spokesperson for TCFSA.
“We recognise that while the concept of ‘stages of grief’ is often used as a reference, grief does not follow a predictable or linear path,” they said when asked about the possible state of mind for parents or grandparents in similar situations to Gus Lamont’s family..
“People may experience a range of emotions such as denial, anger, guilt, depression or acceptance — but not necessarily in a set order. These feelings can come and go over time, and no two individuals grieve in the same way.
“Many parents may never reach what is often described as the ‘acceptance’ stage, as the emotional toll and strain are profound.
“Grief is often described by bereaved parents as a hole or void in the heart that creates a constant ache and will always remain. Others describe it as a physical pain.”
Coping mechanisms
Although the case is very much an active investigation six weeks after Gus vanished, TCFSA says reaching out to others for assistance may be the first step to rationalising the gut-wrenching situation Gus’s family find themselves in.
“Healthy coping often involves allowing yourself to grieve in your own time and way, maintaining connection with others who understand, and finding ways to honour and remember the child, the spokesperson said.
“For many parents, talking with others who have also experienced the loss of a child provides a unique sense of understanding and hope. Attending support groups, journalling, engaging in creative or physical outlets, and practising self-care can all be helpful.
“Within our group, many members find comfort in knowing they are not alone — having a safe space to talk, cry, listen and share how they have managed each day, week, month or year.
“Some also find it meaningful to maintain connections with their child’s friendship group.”
Returning Home
Sadly, Gus’s grandparents’ homestead and his father’s property may be proving a constant reminder that the little boy with the cheeky smile is gone.
“Many parents find returning home difficult, especially if it’s filled with reminders of their child,” the spokesperson added.
“Some choose to make small changes in the home environment, while others keep things as they were for a time. There is no right or wrong approach — each family finds their own way to navigate this part of the journey.
“Christmas can be a particularly difficult time of year. For myself, and many others, being at home can be too painful, so we may choose to spend time away — whether that’s a short holiday, a different environment, or surrounding ourselves with supportive friends.
TCFSA provides a compassionate space where families share their situation with others who have been through a similar experience and while not professional counsellors the group have an established line of referral to appropriate professional or specialist services.
Contact the TCFSA Helpline: 0456 820 133 or the national Helpline: 1300 064 068.
If you or someone you know needs help, phone SANE Australia Helpline on 1800 18 SANE (7263).
