Keep your eyes open
We pray to God for the recovery of our addicted children. We pray hard and often. Yet their drug usage continues. Chaos and the tears punctuate each of our days.
Stop a minute and think! Did God bring someone to your life that has been walking the road of recovery? Does God work through other people? Perhaps? Mine does. Did you pay attention to that person/ “messenger”?
When I needed education he pointed me at people who provided education. I listened to them and learned much. When my son needed a connection to get to a particular halfway house, the person who could get him in appeared in a totally unrelated part of my life. It is God’s subtleties that are the answers to our prayers.
In all likelihood God is probably not going to descend from a cloud and flip the switch on your child’s addiction. In my life I have found his answers to be far subtler. It is important to pray, but please remain cognizant that God might answer those prayers with a prison cell, or an overdose that could be your child’s “bottom”. Accept his answer! He can lift the chaos and tears, but it will be done His way, not ours.
I am far wiser than to begin to think I could figure out God’s plan. I just try to keep my eyes open and remember that…
God works in mysterious ways!
Categorised as: Coping Skills
God answered my prayers last weekend with an second (in three years) arrest for aggravated DWI and possession of used syringes with heroin residue on a spoon. I knew something was going to happen he had been out of my home for a month and a half, got fired from his job and all the signs of heavy use were there. Had my son stayed in my home this probably would never have happened, is that good, no it isn’t I was just controlling his environment and his addiction was controlling me and ruining my life. As difficult as this was I was thanking God as my son had gone full force back to his addiction within the last month, he never really stopped completely and his drinking was out of control. He spent four days in detox, our insurance denied inpatient, which was a disappointment as this was the first time he was willing to stay and was actually enjoying it but again God worked in this situation. After going to court on Thursday night the judge and prosecutor decided that they would like to move the case to drug court, which is a good thing, you are there a year and a half, checking in weekly, treatment is mandated, etc. We also had to pick up a sobrietor (can’t spell it) for my home which goes off at scheduled and random times. He is being drug tested twice a week as well. The judge asked that I let him stay here with me until the next court date, if the sobrietor tests positive at any given time, he goes to jail, same with the drug testing.I’m hoping this is his bottom, it seems to be but I can only hope and live day by day, and not have any expectations whatsoever. My son has been clean for seven days, today is a good day.
Erin ..you are an inspiration to me and Im sure many. Within the storm of your son’s addiction you have always remained calm. Thank you for teaching us!
I wish u continued peace and strength . I hope God’s answer is the one that finally turns your son around!
Peace and strength
If there is one thing that has changed profoundly with my daughter’s addiction it is my spirituality. When i was finally able to ” let go and let God” i found peace in knowing that God has a plan and that my daughter’s recovery was up to her and her relationship with God. She has found recovery through Christianity and practices this everyday. One of her biggest gifts to me was asking me to read ” the Big Book” of AA. It is 167 pages and the rest of the book are anadotal stories of recovery. It changed my life and gave me a base to discuss recovery with her.
The other night , at a parents support group i attend, a women spoke of Dr Bob’s recovery. He is the co founder of AA and he was brought to recovery by a man who actually relasped and died of alcoholism. The point was this man, i believe his name was Emond, may have died of his active addiction but actually made a significant contribution to recovery. It was offered as a member of the group was trying to find peace in her son’s death from OD. I do think God works in mysterious ways and there is wisdom to be found in the pain of addiction; to be humble and compassionate, to live each day at a time. Thank you Bill, you too have been a gift from God and i appreciate the wisdom of your journal.
Amen! Thanks for for those thoughts. As I think back, God has, indeed, sent many messengers into my life and my sons’ life. Even though seeing my son in jail facing a prison term was NOT what I prayed for, I am convinced that his arrest was God’s way of saving his life. I don’t think he would have lasted much longer on the path that he was traveling.
A tremendous gift of this journey has been a friendship I have developed with my son’s first AA sponsor. When my son went on a year long run my husband and I met and talked with the sponsor. He has since attended Alanon meetings that we frequent. The sponsor’s insight, suggestions and opinions have been dead on. I don’t know who the sponsor has helped more – my son or my husband and me.
Very well put. And sound truths about God. Thank you again for all you give to those of us whose lives have been hit by addiction.