Accepting their windfalls
Our addicts often come into large cash windfalls through various life events. Lottery winnings and inheritances have been the two most common windfalls I have seen over time.
When our kids are active and they end up with large sums of money we have to batten down the hatches and pray to our Higher Power.
It’s their money and there is not much else we can do but apply the following line from a prayer I once read;
ACCEPT THE THINGS I CAN NOT CHANGE
Perhaps they will waste the money. We must accept. Maybe that money will put them on a tear of a drug run like we have never seen before. We must accept. We must let them learn to manage money.
Perhaps at the end of that “run” they will have hit bottom. Perhaps the money will be the thing that turns them towards recovery. Who knows?
Guess what? That is called projecting. Don’t do it! Projection is the biggest flaw in my recovery. I have to remind myself to Let go and let God and accept. It is a work in progress.
Accept the things you cannot change… Inheritances and lottery winnings included!
Peace and strength
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Categorised as: Coping Skills, Journal Entries
sorta another addiction journal, i suppose or guess so
closet-junkie101.blogspot.com
when my sister lost her leg ( she was hit by a drunk driver) my parents never sued; they settled with the insurance company for a small amt of money that would help my sister pay for college. When she graduated from BU she became a member of the disabled ski team and trained in Colorado with other. I remember her telling me how sad it was to watch the ” trust fund” amputees occupy their time with drugs and alcohol. She was working to pay for her room and board and did not have time for all this; the point is i think it is good to work hard for your money and easy money comes at a cost. You can only control what you can give to your child and let go of the rest ( worry about the future only brings anxiety). I have personally made it so my girls ( both addict and non addict) will have to wait well into their 40′s to get any inheritence from me….i believe they should make it on their own and if they are really desparate than my sister ( as trustee) can help them out…money can be a route of evil and many of us can look back on our ” blue collar” stuggles with fond memories of ” character building”.
I remember Brett's second overdose. We were flipping a duplex and he got a fairly nice paycheck. We had the discussion of me putting 1/2 of it away in savings for a car, but of course, he could save it. Hours later we were at the hospital because he overdosed. Let Go, Let God!
so sorry for him and his family
He basically had the same theory. His money, his control. As a parent you at least have to try. Did not work that night. Even the night that he died. He bought a bunch of Xanax so he could sell some (making money). The guy he bought them from only brought over half, and was supposed to return. Brett lost track of how many he took and then shot heroin on top of it. His heart just gave out.
Kathy B. Coules O'Keefe..did Brett get his hands on the money? Im confused.. You know you guys are always in my prayers and I urge other parents who have payed the supreme sacrifice to vist Kathy's group called WTF (winning the fight! )
So sad. It's a tough choice but many feel that we must let them cure themselves. Everyone has to do what they feel is best for their family and child. Hopefully others learn from our wins and losses. What you do for others Kathy B. Coules O'Keefe is truly a gift from above. Much peace and strength!
Accepting…