Addiction Journal

Not so pragmatic

Blogging is a personal expression. Often I “share”, sometimes forcefully, my opinions at the Addiction Journal. Opinions are shared to help others learn from my mistakes and my more positive experiences. Sometimes this journal is far less personal and more pragmatic.

Today I will share a far more personal post.

Addiction is truly a family issue, affecting grandparents, siblings, aunts /uncles, moms and dads. Blood relatives are unwillingly sucked into the vortex of addiction.

I have mentioned a few times over the past year of my posts that I was widowed four years ago. Following my wife’s passing, addiction hit my family right between the eyes. I made many mistakes on the first part of my journey but kept studying.

I met an amazing woman who came into my life during a strong period in my son’s sobriety. She accepted my family and the addiction issues of my son. She was told the drug chaos “war stories”, yet kept on loving both me and my kids. I would never blindside someone with this workings and drama of this disease.

The great relapse of Dec 2011 (sounds like a hurricane or severe financial event) soon hit my new family. My son was again using his drug of choice. My girlfriend’s love and support never waivered when others would have run fast and far away from the chaos that rained down upon life at that point.

Today my son’s sobriety is again in a better place after a truly bumpy road over the last few months. He is meeting with his sponsor this evening to do his “inventory”. Today is a good day.

To my girlfriend, I thank you for your unwavering support during the chaos of addiction. You have been simply amazing and supportive beyond belief. The “Addiction Road” is not an easy journey for the “non blood” relative to travel. You have held my hand when the bombs of war were flying over the last few months and I will never forget!

Love always!


Categorised as: Journal Entries


26 Comments

  1. Mary Jane says:

    WOW…I just finished my makeup and I am tears are ruining my freshly applied mascara….
    She is amazing there are few people like her in this world….But then there are few people in this world like you either….I am sure that no matter what the situation you make her feel safe…..I wish nothing but happiness for both of you…..ANd you son, how lucky for him that you met someone with a heart big enough to bring everyone in and make a family…..MJ
    Going to fix the makeup

  2. lauren says:

    You and your son both are blessed to have her in your life.
    Is your son currently living at home? I struggle wiht that idea. My oldest addict son has been living in a halfway house for the last 8 months and will be transitioning into sober living apartments He has been off heroin, with the use of methadone since June 4 2011. He is begging to come home. One part of me wants to let him, the other part is afraid. I have a younger daughter who has lived the last 7 years of her life in this chaos. We do support him by bus passes, mthly visits home a few bucks here and there.When we have brought him home before, after rehabs he has relapsed and stolen thousands of dollars from us, among other things. What was your criteria and thoughts on them coming home? I pray for you and your families continued success.

  3. Sue Sampson says:

    I finish what I start and my job started almost 40 years ago. I had an easy time with one child and I thank her for that but I must my next job through. I take a lot of advise from this link. It is just relaxong and informative for me to talk to these people as support. I don't think this came to any surprise to those I know but will be more careful in the future

    [comment edited]

    • BoBo Pig says:

      Recovery is a lifelong process, we react in different ways when our loved ones embark on it's journey.. anger, compassion, sympathy, I've seen it all. Support is key. I'm glad you have found a site where you can relate to others in your situation. Miss you so much…if you need anyone to talk to, please call me!!! ♥ MUCH LOVE

    • Marilyn Hollinger Park says:

      We all totally support you and what you're trying to do. We can NEVER give up on our kids

    • Sue we All have moments that we regret. We were teens at one time. We messed up thinking that we knew it all.Oops. maybe our parents may have had a vested interest in our livelihood. We didnt think so and maybe she doesnt either. Time will tell. I know that your intention was based in Love and in time so will she. :) ))

  4. Lisa says:

    Touching post. I have often wondered how you navigated this nightmare after losing your wife. I’m glad this beautiful, supportive woman was put into your life. Sometimes relationships grow stronger in the midst of chaos. I hope you both are enjoying the peacefulness of this good day.

  5. Sue Sampson says:

    That is sooooo nice to hear. [edit per request] We struggle day after day not to lose him but understand we might, but we also lost her to herself. Sad isn't it.

  6. Sandra Dever Tanner says:

    Also God Bless you Bill :)

  7. shelley says:

    there aint nothing like the support of another human being. i love it. lucky you, lucky her.

  8. Suzanne Horton says:

    That was just beautiful. So happy for you to have this wonderful woman in your life.

  9. Sandra Dever Tanner says:

    So well said- people come into our lives for a reason I totally believe that. God is good! God Bless, Diane and your beautiful child!

  10. Carrie Pfenning says:

    I feel the same way about my husband. Since he is not my son’s father, it was very different for him while our family struggled while my son was using. Even though he was concerned for my son, he was more concerned about how the chaos was harming ME, while I (in the beginning) could only think of my firstborn. Love and support are vital to walking through this…you are blessed. And so is she.

    • AddictionJournal says:

      thanks Carrie..Blood Relative vs Non Blood has always been something I have seen in diff. support groups I have belonged to. I truly give credit to those who support and those that support them..

      hope all is well

  11. Erin says:

    Your girlfriend is definitely an AMAZING woman, it is so true many would run from the situation. I’ve heard many stories about this happening. You should marry that woman!

  12. Lulu says:

    Thanks for sharing from your heart. Many times during addiction in our families, relationships are broken and injured. So glad to hear of your support.

    • AddictionJournal says:

      thanks lulu. Standing by someone who has this affliction affecting a family is truly a tribute to the supporter’s character.

      I give her and many others credit for standing strong in support.

  13. Susan Willis Silva says:

    tears! and yes she is an amazing woman. Hold fast to her you certainly have a keeper!

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